SS 2 “My Brother is Dying”

“My Brother is Dying”

As I shared at the end of my personal salvation story, it was when I heard that my brother, Damian, was dying of leukemia that the salvation of my loved ones became all too real. Again, I knew that confronting him with the very popular but pertinent question, “Do you know where you’ll go when you die?” could certainly shake him up, yet I had already spoken to the Lord about what to do. I asked Him to simply keep Damian alive long enough so he could experience Him as His Savior. I told Him I would let my brother go as long as I knew I’d see him again in heaven.

The type of Leukemia Damian had was significant to me because, being a PreMed student at one time, I was eager to research to know more about it. Unfortunately, having more information shook me even more—because it confirmed what I had heard already.

The category of leukemia Damian had gave its victim only ONE remission due to its quick and powerful aggressiveness. And also, due to how quickly it took its victims, there was very little they knew about this form of cancer. Most of these patients died, and only later, they found it was (this type of) Leukemia.

Yet I knew the Lord is faithful. I hadn’t yet discovered the promise, “Believe on the Lord, and you will be saved, and your entire household” (Acts 16:31), yet I believed He'd heard my prayer.

Ultimately, the Lord had been my Best Friend while I was growing up and later became my Lord just before my husband left me, which meant I sensed His faithfulness growing stronger along with my intense desire to see Damian saved before he died. What He led me to do first was to focus on the possibility of him living. This led to many members of our family giving blood and keeping him alive, but unfortunately (which God used for good), it's what led to me suffering some severe health issues, showing up when I began to lose most of my own hair as if I were the cancer victim.

When I was tested, my blood type was a perfect match, so I began donating blood for Damian to survive. About two weeks into donating blood, large clumps of my hair began to fall out, but as always, He worked things out for good. The doctor said I’d lose all my hair (and, of course, ordered that I no longer give blood) and suggested that I cut off my waist-length hair to save what I had left.

The favor of God kicked in when a local celebrity hairdresser heard about my story (when, bless her heart, my mother called to tell the stylist the story) and set up a private appointment with me. He came in while one of his salons was closed to brush out my hair carefully (so no more would fall out), braid it, and then cut it off—when my hair fell beautifully to my shoulders. Honestly, the new hairstyle changed how I looked; truthfully, it was the best I had looked in years! But let’s get back to my brother, Damian…

Damian was diagnosed only a few weeks after my third son, Easton, was born. [And not that this is of any real significance, but Easton, and later my daughter Tyler, were both born on Damian's birthday! Sadly, my brother believed this was a sign of his impending death, having his nephew replace him.]

Wanting to live for his three young sons, Damian flew to a variety of cities across the country, begging for a bone marrow transplant. At the time, in 1985, bone marrow transplants were only successful in children and young adults. Damian, they said, was too old. Then, one day, after he had exhausted all the cancer treatment hospitals, he got an unexpected call from UCLA Medical Center. They asked my brother if he was still in remission and if he was still interested in trying, then they’d perform his bone marrow transplant. The two doctors had just returned from helping with the Chornobyl Disaster and discovered ways to prevent the normal bone marrow rejection process. Today, of course, medicine has moved far beyond this, and transplants are much more common.

It was my older sister who ultimately donated her bone marrow, and as we had all hoped and prayed, Damian survived the transplant and was told he was cancer-free about a year later.

Yet, here is the truth. My brother, Damian, has been the only survivor of this form of cancer for close to four decades! Due to this "medical miracle," UCLA celebrates and throws a “birthday” party for him each year. Yet, I know it was not the doctors (as brilliant as they were/are) nor the treatment he received—Damian is alive today due to God healing my brother!! And not just heal his body but also heal his soul.

As I said, I never confronted my siblings or even made it a point to share anything about my relationship with the Lord. I speak of the Lord often, as I always do, as a close Best Friend. It’s always been part of my conversations with my siblings and everyone I speak to. But I never talked to him in any religious or typical “witnessing” manner. Instead, the Lord told me to TRUST HIM, that salvation is His, which I have come to understand is what He doesn’t really “need” our help with, but what He “lets” us help with.

"You need not fight in this battle; station yourselves, stand and see the salvation of the Lord on your behalf...Do not fear or be dismayed...the Lord is with you” (2 Chronicles 20:17).

An easy way to explain how He helped me understand this so I can explain it to you is when I used to ask my younger children to “help” me make my bed. They would get on one side and do very little to “help.” Then I say, "Now it's time to switch sides," and I’d fix their side while praising them! My little children would beam because they’d “helped” Mommy, but it was far from “helpful.”

In fact, for this miracle, God didn’t use me at all.

One day, Damian called long-distance to tell me how he was doing, and on one occasion, he began sharing about the profound change in his middle son. This was the son who was troubled from birth BUT who was completely transformed and had changed into a "totally different person" the moment he got “saved.” Each time Damian would call and talk about specific changes in my nephew, I sensed my brother was very close to wanting to know Him, too.

Yet, I knew better than to say anything. Instead, I knew the Lord wanted me to stand and see, trust Him, and witness the second miracle in Damian's life. A couple of times, I listened and spoke about my relationship with the Lord, again, just because that’s who I am, who He is in my life, and how I’ve always been. Yet, I never confronted or spoke directly to Damian about his salvation because, as with many older brothers, I knew he’d probably try to debate with me.

Then, one day, I just KNEW it had happened, and because I was so excited, I stupidly began to ramble on with insignificant chatter when Damian cut in and said, “If you’d be quiet for a second, I’d like to tell you something!” I shut my mouth, but then it dropped open in awe! I heard my very own brother tell me that he had asked the Lord to come into his life, to make him new, and say from his own heart, "Erin, the Lord is everything to me!"!!!

At that exact moment, is when I personally believe Damian was also completely healed from the incurable form of leukemia that could have returned. To this day, there is really no other explanation.

Yes, Damian had a bone transplant and a lot of other surgeries, yet, sadly, due to his many leukemia treatments—the side effects of his treatment, not his leukemia, are what's done the lingering, long-term damage. But it doesn't explain why, today, more than 40 years later, Damian is still alive!! And, even though he is still attending his annual birthday party at UCLA, since he still is the lone survivor, I believe it proves it was GOD who healed his soul and not just his body!!

As I end, remember what God says: “Ye are our epistles written in our hearts, known and read of all men"...“You are our letter, written in our hearts, known and read by all men” (2 Corinthians 3:2).

* This means "witnessing" doesn't mean confrontation. Instead, it means your life is an epistle or an open book everyone reads every day of your life. Everyone "witnesses" how you live your life: How you face challenges and how you love the unlovable. I hope and pray it is the Abundant Life you are living!!

Epistles in Greek is Epistello, which means to "send one a message, to write instructions." Our lives should be sending a message to show how to live in peace and joy, “smiling at the future” because of who we are living today and our future with!

My family has witnessed my life for over seven decades. They knew the Erin before I met Him and the Erin who traveled through many trials but always remained at peace in the midst. As I said, I have never once confronted anyone (family, friend, or a stranger about their salvation), but have been blessed to simply watch His salvation unfold while I stood by in awe—having a front-row seat to His splendor! I speak to everyone the way I speak to you in this book while not using Christian lingo that's offputting.

Without having the stress of making every time you talk or meet with your unsaved relatives or friends about trying to "save" them, it will allow you the freedom to simply and wonderfully LOVE them. Trust me, this will accomplish more to have them "want what you have" and what will result in them asking you to show them the way to knowing Him, too! 

Dear reader, I urge you to stop worrying or trying to get your family “saved” and simply BELIEVE these promises for your family and special loved ones! 

Please don't skip over this promise. Read it again and again until it's safely hidden in your heart. “‘Believe on the Lord and you will be saved, and your entire household’” (Acts 16:31 ).

And remember, it’s nothing WE do but what He has done!!

“Do not fear! Stand by and see the salvation of the Lord, which He will accomplish for you today..." (Exodus 14:13).

"You need not fight in this battle; station yourselves, stand and see the salvation of the Lord on your behalf . . . Do not fear or be dismayed . . . the Lord is with you” (2 Chronicles 20:17).

I personally love to "station myself" in the front row with a huge smile on my face in anticipation of what I KNOW the Lord is about to do...will you join me?